She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
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