How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Randomize
