I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
