I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
