I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize