my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
