So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Randomize