I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
smell my finger.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
