Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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