super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize