Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
