You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
