i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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