I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
