oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize
