I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
