then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
How come I'm the only one who's around when people show up? I had just taken a shit, I wasn't wearing pants, phantom of the opera was playing and the fridge said PENIS.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
