my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize
