i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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