is your mom at the bar?
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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