a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
