Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
