David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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