...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
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