He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
