kristin has been a bad kristin
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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