you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
