Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
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