You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
True college students do jello shots in the library
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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