Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize