can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
