We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
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