1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
