i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
She's the barista slut.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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