Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
