The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
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