He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
