Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Randomize
