He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
