I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
