i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Randomize
