great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Four minutes until I can fart!
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize