No awkward lesbian experiences without me
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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