I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
Randomize
