Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
