I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Sorry about my life...
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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