I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
