Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Someone signed my nipple.
Randomize
