i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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