I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize